Meet Fidelty’s Best Friend: Effort

The Things We Do for Love, Photo from BradensEye Archives

Sometimes you must be shaken before you’re stirred. There are desires, people, projects, and causes to which I’m deeply loyal. I’m an ardent believer in romance and relationships and responsibility. In fact, all my best beliefs are wrapped up with a giant custom hand-crafted bow of faith. All the while, nestled inside every texturous thread of that pretty, eye-catching, attention-grabbing weave is a bushel of efforts. There’s the effort to ideate the notion of its availability, next to work to create it, have it be so adorned it’s noticed, then sharing its existence with the world, and ultimately providing it as accessible on all sides necessary. That’s a whole ton of allegiance to any one thing. Within the enterprise of anything are these cosmetics of fidelity. Just such as toxins don’t regularly jump from your body, so much as a super sweaty exertion will knock them clear away from you. In order for you to succeed in your devotion, you must apply yourself.

What you get from life will be direct proportion to what you give to life. ~Gail Lynne Goodwin

We want the effort à la mode, please… impervious to slumps, bumps, or crumples of contorted displacement. We’re always seeking shortcuts. But this writing isn’t about blame nor shame. Instead, I’m simply outlining the groundwork half my life has chosen to shove down my throat in hopes it tastes more like a malty milkshake for you than the kudzu dirty blend as it’s sometimes drifted at me. The ennobling of our existence adheres to effort. We ought to be bulging with exploits of ravenous achievement. If you must collapse, may it be from the tenderness of effect. Care to the extent of absurd thirst. Let your only fury be a synchronized redemption of commitment. Failing to conserve your energy is the name of this game.

Communication leads to community. ~Rollo May

Philosophical discussions of how to improve oneself are rabbit hole conversations on which I thrive at the speed of binge-watching Game of Thrones from the beginning to catch up with the rest of you currently. If a week goes by without a juicy cerebral melting pot of consideration for me a withering begins to damper my sunshiny aura. It’s bad enough when a grump is amongst us. But when light bearers set aside their wands for any length it might as well be the Battle of Ice and Fire (I’m all GOT caught up!) or “the midnight hour close at hand” come to life really. So, when a routine bubbly bestie call turns on the heart light of vulnerability I’m eternally grateful to hash integrity reflections. There is super strength in leadership of the soul resurrecting to its greatest potential. Pulling out the elbow greasing of inner dialogue with ourselves we deepen the very connection it takes to begin building the bridge needed to (re)fasten fidelity. Add the ability of when we clearly and gracefully communicate with others we expand the possibility of the true nature of what the “it takes a village” phrase means as our literal life support.

You get the best out of others when you give the best of yourself. ~Harvey S. Firestone

Self-preservation is usually emotions masking as the forest animals against themselves during a crisis of hunger, land, or anything survival. When we’re stuck in a conundrum of fighting for fidelity’s friends ~ monogamy, honesty, dependability ~ it’s the ripe moment a most trusted one is our utmost task at hand. Here we may meet fidelity’s best friend ~ effort. The same effort to care for another is the undertaking with yourself. Recently, having a short window of time in the middle of a job deadline to accomplish a vital health errand, I admired the freeways and routes that allowed me to reliably benefit myself personally and my work professionally (which indirectly is more for me again in the way of income) with speed. The skills and time it took to build and maintain these interstate overpasses came to mean so much to me in minutes. The moving manner a beloved friend confides in me they will revisit the love of their rocky marriage status, liberally noting all the good it created, and how much space there is to try flooding it with the diligence of attention after years of faltering in aspects. You cannot purchase these forces, or even steal them. Providing, protecting, authenticity, and confidence of human spirit are the nuggets of life you may acquire through application.

A garden requires patient labor and attention. Plants do not grow merely to satisfy ambitions or to fulfill good intentions. They thrive because someone expended effort on them. ~Liberty Hyde Bailey

The truth of all effort fills our wells as labors of love. Not giving up, giving in, and certainly not forgetting what it takes to make a difference are the cornerstones of aspiring to the ranks of fidelity’s fortunes. As we buckle down to discipline this work, learning where not to place your effort is as crucial as why you need to be effortful elsewhere. Let your cage be rattled enough that you feel the gravity of the option to abandon. I suggest you think the entirety of coping-out through, in hopes to relax your stop mechanism, thereby restoring your pride. This is realizing that which you covet closely and dream of largely can truly be yours, remain yours, by receiving maintenance in lieu of resignation. The illusion of a runaround is that all your dodging and ducking simply end up increasing your efforts in all the demeaning capacities. What we tend to precisely intends to yield one’s troth.

You give to yourself by giving of yourself. ~Matt Kahn

Remember the elegant taste of an effort well placed.



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LOVER of life. Especially people, places, philanthropy, pondering, and photography.