If you’ve ever been dealt a bad hand at any card game you’re likely nimble with some naughty language unfit for toddlers to teens. You might question whether the dealer is shuffling all cards available or not. With precision, we can bark when irked that some seemingly phat-minded cat’s ‘not playing with a full deck’. We imply there’s an alternative to the ambiance which could benefit us. Just as we know two sides to every coin. And we’ve coined the phrase: there are two sides to every situation (in the least). Operating as if a polar pair doesn’t exist within us is an evasive absurdity.
Take a well-worn penny plucked from the ground for good luck. One side might be worn to a near-imperceptible nub. However, that little piece of money is still worth exactly what it’s supposed to be. Straddle the divides of divorce, political candidates, job loss, and more. Listen as many a breakup turmoil goes spilling riotous fabrications concealing greater truths beneath. Compare the commodity of change agents mentality who see upheaval as par for the course to any consistent killjoy you know. Yet, it is our whole which encompasses the economic efficiency of our endurance. We are stronger for our resolve to rise and not retreat in defeat.
It’s all pretty obvious. There’s the light and dark of life. We have the side-winding curvature of all the bogus bits that aren’t clearly bright or pitch black negativity. I mean, we didn’t wake up a bunch of guppies appearing to many without feelings and truly only having a few months worth. Yet, most of us aren’t living in captivity or containers. Besides, many I know who have and survived their way out, such as my dear friend Rani with her Tronie Foundation, aspire to altruism we could all use as conversion therapy.
My impression of playing with a full deck is sitting ringside for the entire show. I’m out to fondle and battle any trailblazing to rigmarole. This croaks the need to swallow anxiety asteroids hurdling anywhere in my direction or vicinity. I want to herald my moral sins through shameless learning. I aim blind-sided sucker-punches to the stunts my strategy mind tries to pull over on me with assumptions and expectations. I will abide by my overwhelm or failure to get out of bed before the afternoon postman arrives knowing a personal revival looms in the shadows. While we may suffer the slings and arrows, we can also choose inspired actions. I prophetically run this course called life (or more often walk it on a good day).
The point is we call the shots of our life. We write our own narrative. The bonus is you have a positive bone. Joy is in all of us. Though, I feel all the leery eyes of those skeptics of any pretty packaging due to your scars and burn marks. If we’re choosing to slyly paralyze our advantages then we have no further than ourselves to look for uncurbing our enthusiasm to the points of joyful intoxication. For every maniacal, cynical, grumpy, disdainful, unrelenting grouch residing inside, you do have the full chromatic capability of a rainbow (, as I hear a few friends barfing jocularity). Every one us is playing with a full deck. You might instead be choosing to reveal nothing beyond your hostility. But you have access to the same ethically good gourmet adrenaline coursing in my veins.
I’ve spun the life wheel to win and lose multiple rounds. However, as a wise friend reminded me recently via this Napoleon Hill quote: “No more effort is required to aim high in life, to demand abundance and prosperity, than is required to accept misery and poverty”. Joni had that full life deck mapped out marvelously in Both Sides Now. I was dealt an ambitious dose of positive DNA, but that doesn’t stop the decked-out demons from knocking on my door. It has aided me in connecting to a self-induced enchantment anthem when I have to remember how to keep the ‘cool’ winds blowing in honor of my birth surname ‘Kuhlman’ (first four letters pronounced as such).
Love Actually resides at the root of everyone. Watching the flick for the umpteenth time reminded me how easy it can be to tap out of the chatter and step into our light. Take a trip to your happy place. Identify where your happiest places are — physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and personally with people you know. What do you need to get to those places, spaces, and personalities more often? Start some routine maintenance of how you can flip from A to B faster than any casino swipes your cash. This is life tuition. You can have the big payoff in lieu of billowing debt. The difference is paying the price to predict and conquer.
“I am one of the searchers. There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content. We continue to explore life, hoping to uncover its ultimate secret. We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand. We like to walk along the beach, we are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power, its unceasing motion, its mystery and unspeakable beauty. We like forests and mountains, deserts and hidden rivers, and the lonely cities as well. Our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter. To share our sadness with one we love is perhaps as great a joy as we can know — unless it be to share our laughter.
We searchers are ambitious only for life itself, for everything beautiful it can provide. Most of all we love and want to be loved. We want to live in a relationship that will not impede our wandering, nor prevent our search, nor lock us in prison walls; that will take us for what little we have to give. We do not want to prove ourselves to another or compete for love.
For wanderers, dreamers, and lovers, for lonely men and women who dare to ask of life everything good and beautiful. It is for those who are too gentle to live among wolves.”
― James Kavanaugh, There Are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves
My happiest place comes from monitoring all corners of my atmosphere from the cozy to the unkempt. Knowing I will need to navigate some shitstorms sets up an awareness to create within me an ever-growing well of atomic forcefield symphonic indomitable energy to drink from in foul-mouthed times. I dote on writing love letters in nature or going strolling in parks to watch lovebirds of all kinds in full PDA bloom. I’m lifted when others are lifted. It’s a personal choice. When I believe in aces high and my ability to land a royal flush then my anything-is-possible super-cape stance has my back and I skip a lot more like a silly Slurpee-smiling schoolgirl.
Play your winning hands like a pro.